Round 8: Annnnnndddddd we're back at square 1
Dec 3, 2017 19:44:27 GMT
John, Adam, and 7 more like this
Post by Nick on Dec 3, 2017 19:44:27 GMT
Okay last night the result of the last challenge predictably blew up in Jenn and I's face. And there is a lot that fucking sucks about that, but one of the worst is that it feels like it was unavoidable. Based on the status of my game following The Ben Vote™ and the exile twist, I obviously had to spill my entire game and as a result of that everybody on Yurbaco fucking though I wanted to work with them. And fucking NEWS FLASH, all of y'all aren't that likable, get off your high fucking horses and assume that I'm desperate enough the want to play with you. I didn't try to fake an alliance with Aren's 15 year old self or Sam's inflated ego fucking self. The only people on old Yurbaco I wanted to work with was Lizzie, Teddy, and Steffen. Don is not somebody you want in an ally because he talks to much, and I hadn't talked to Tierra until yesterday (although she's awesome, I'm gonna enjoy my inevitable ponderosa stay with her).
BUT ANYWAY.
As demonstrated by my voting confessional, I knew that Jeff, Austin, and Lizzie were going to fuck me over at the vote. And if little miss Queen Bey herself, Mrs. Drug Dealer anonymous Lizzie Black Panther Esposito (if I just used a shitty fucking Tomi Lahren line against you, we're done) hadn't fucked me over as hard as she did on a personal level, I'd be driving to Toronto to hit Geoff with a car and leave his carnage in the streets. I'm not even waste anymore of my fucking breath on Austin, I already went in on him yesterday after vote and we will leave that at that.
So me @ jeff and Austin:
Lizzie played me so fucking dirty and not even on a game level, although of a game level she's a fucking coward.
So she's dead to me at this point.
Honestly I'm about this fucking close to snapping at her at tribal tonight just because how hurt I feel by her, I truly feel as though she hasn't been genuine with me once all game when I've given her everything. I talked to her on the phone for 3 fucking hours at exile, 4 fucking hours on my drive back to school, I watched the shitty fucking glee project with her even though I was sleep deprived just because she asked. I call ALL THE FUCKING BULLSHIT in the world if she claims she didn't know how she stood with me. Seriously, I'm fucking done with her and her joke of a game. If the winner of season 8 wasn't a great winner than Lizzie is the perfect representation for that season. Leah got #robbed of returning.
Then, hours later, little miss ray of sunshine has returned from her hiking tribe, hiding in her blanket, sadly not eaten by a bear, and sends me this fake ass, lack of genuine emotion (predictable) message.
to which I responded with:
I'm not reading that right now. I'm hurt lizzie. really fucking hurt. Like as a friend. Not even what you did, but avoiding me all day, like I had your back. I thought I closer to you than anyone else, even jenn (which like, a lie on that part but...). Like, when we talked on the phone on my ride to school, that's not game, that's friendship.
to which she countered with:
I know, Nick. And those moments were just about friendship to me I promise you that. I don’t want to diminish that or make you think it was for any other motive. I enjoy and respect and admire you. As for being close in the game, I felt that way too, but I started hearing and noticing things that made me question that. I’m not sure if you want me to get into them or not. I’m not sure if you’ll even read this. But I understand your hurt, and it is COMPLETELY valid and I know there is nothing I can really say to change that. I HOPE it can, as two people who seem to have connected in an immediate way I’ve found rare, but I understand either way.
I don't know if it just that I feel so burned by her on a personal level, but absolutely nothing in that message seems genuine to me.
In conclusion, here is the status on Sam-Aren-Austin then Geoff, and than Paolo from lizzie mcgurie.
BUT ANYWAY.
As demonstrated by my voting confessional, I knew that Jeff, Austin, and Lizzie were going to fuck me over at the vote. And if little miss Queen Bey herself, Mrs. Drug Dealer anonymous Lizzie Black Panther Esposito (if I just used a shitty fucking Tomi Lahren line against you, we're done) hadn't fucked me over as hard as she did on a personal level, I'd be driving to Toronto to hit Geoff with a car and leave his carnage in the streets. I'm not even waste anymore of my fucking breath on Austin, I already went in on him yesterday after vote and we will leave that at that.
So me @ jeff and Austin:
Lizzie played me so fucking dirty and not even on a game level, although of a game level she's a fucking coward.
So she's dead to me at this point.
Honestly I'm about this fucking close to snapping at her at tribal tonight just because how hurt I feel by her, I truly feel as though she hasn't been genuine with me once all game when I've given her everything. I talked to her on the phone for 3 fucking hours at exile, 4 fucking hours on my drive back to school, I watched the shitty fucking glee project with her even though I was sleep deprived just because she asked. I call ALL THE FUCKING BULLSHIT in the world if she claims she didn't know how she stood with me. Seriously, I'm fucking done with her and her joke of a game. If the winner of season 8 wasn't a great winner than Lizzie is the perfect representation for that season. Leah got #robbed of returning.
Then, hours later, little miss ray of sunshine has returned from her hiking tribe, hiding in her blanket, sadly not eaten by a bear, and sends me this fake ass, lack of genuine emotion (predictable) message.
nick. putting the game aside I want to say i'm extremely sorry if I hurt you tonight. I realize it was poor gameplay, but on a bigger level, it was really unkind to you. I'm sure you're confused and frustrated and angry and hurt by me. I've been there. I hope you know I have enjoyed every conversation we've had and have valued your company and spirit incredibly thus far in the game. I hope you don't see this as an effort for me to correct something in the game, I realize it is my game to lose. I don't expect anything from you, not a text back, or an open door or a jury vote. I don't care about that right now. I realize you probably don't want to speak to me. I realize you probably won't ever trust me again. But I wanted you to know that I do realize the effects something like this can have a on a person and I want you to know if you want to talk about it, I will be here to do so.
to which I responded with:
I'm not reading that right now. I'm hurt lizzie. really fucking hurt. Like as a friend. Not even what you did, but avoiding me all day, like I had your back. I thought I closer to you than anyone else, even jenn (which like, a lie on that part but...). Like, when we talked on the phone on my ride to school, that's not game, that's friendship.
to which she countered with:
I know, Nick. And those moments were just about friendship to me I promise you that. I don’t want to diminish that or make you think it was for any other motive. I enjoy and respect and admire you. As for being close in the game, I felt that way too, but I started hearing and noticing things that made me question that. I’m not sure if you want me to get into them or not. I’m not sure if you’ll even read this. But I understand your hurt, and it is COMPLETELY valid and I know there is nothing I can really say to change that. I HOPE it can, as two people who seem to have connected in an immediate way I’ve found rare, but I understand either way.
I don't know if it just that I feel so burned by her on a personal level, but absolutely nothing in that message seems genuine to me.
In conclusion, here is the status on Sam-Aren-Austin then Geoff, and than Paolo from lizzie mcgurie.
